Advice for Brian Kearney's Defence Team.

Brian Kearney is currently on trial for the murder of his wife.
I think he did it..... but I always think they did it!
However, he's entitled to the best defence the state can provide.

Say hello to CoCo, my Dog!

Lots of Bloggers have introduced us to their dogs, (well Twenty, K8, and Headrambles have!) their dogs are man eating rabid monsters, whereas CoCo is a dope.

Back to the trial;
During the prosecution evidence it was said that Brian Kearney, on the afternoon of the murder was panting heavily with panic, then, when asked what things his boy would need to take with him to his Aunts, he stopped, then spoke calmly without panting to the police officer about the child's requirements, then when he finished, began panting again, thus suggesting this panting was a "put on"?

Now CoCo pants a lot!
However whenever I gesture to put her lead on, she stops panting completely, once the lead is on though. she instantly resumes her panting again.
VOILA! The dopey dog defence!
If his legal team require CoCo they should howl loudly on the night of a full moon.

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Mothers Day

I broke one of my own golden rules and booked a restaurant for a Hallmark day lunch.
I did it last Thursday evening, as I passed the Courtyard restaurant in Donnybrook (one of our favorites) I decided to see if they had any tables free on the day. they squeezed me in for 3:15.
When we arrived the first thing that hit was the noise, it was like a playschool with kids everywhere, fair enough I guess we should have realised.
Next was the SET menu! gone was the usual selection of goodies to choose from.
Then there was the price! €30 per person including mandatory service charge of 10% and not including drinks.
(I'd always give a 10% tip, but I feckin' hate when it's mandatory!
The service was DIRE! A 40 minute wait between courses, my wife can't stand to listen to me drone for that long without distraction!
To top it all......... the food wasn't great either!
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Signs Of Old Age

The other night I got a fare to Lusk, dropping off at Sutton Cross first,
I'd said "cool A trip to the seaside"
and then the girl asked,"did I mind going to Lusk?",
to which I replied "No, sure that's where all the beautiful people live" and continued on my way. Suddenly I realised my head was so full of Lusk that I'd forgotten completely what the first destination was and had to ask!
This forgetfulness is beginning to happen too often!
I sometimes find myself driving along, yapping away, then I arrive at a junction, the fork junction for Rathmines/Ranelagh/Harolds Cross, is a good example and then I have to ask, "where did you say you where going again?"
Is it just me?
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Roads Roy's Pissed on

We Taxi drivers have got to relieve ourselves!
So if you're lucky enough to travel in a Taxi on one of the roads listed, just say;
"this is a road Roy pissed on"
and if you're in my cab, you'll get a 10% discount off the fare!.
I'll start it from tonight and add to it as I go along.

The first road to be given this great honour is;

1. Old Court Road in Tallaght
2. Laurel Grove in Ranelagh
3. Raglan Road in Ballsbridge (very posh)
   

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Interview on Spin 103.8

This is my interview with Jonathon and Clare on Spin 103.8, I guess if you can't laugh at yourself, life is harder?;

Get your own playlist at snapdrive.net!


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I'm Heartbroken

I was chatting to a friend yesterday, a regular reader of the blog and a one time regular commenter.
I asked her how come she doesn't comment as much lately and she replied;
"If you write something interesting, then I might be able to comment on it"
After picking myself up of the floor and wiping my tears I thought about it and realised; "Beepys right!"
I'll try make it more interesting in future, I blame the customers, they just aren't as entertaining as they used to be!
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Blood Brothers

No I didn't perform an Apache friendship ritual with one of my passengers, instead I went to the theater to see the show.
Yeah, even after my diatribe on the evils of Valentines day, I brought my wife out tonight to celebrate.
The show was brilliant, the first half brought back echoes of my childhood, even though it was based in the Liverpool of the 70's, it felt like Dublin.
The second half was darker and ultimately very sad but is still highly recommended.
The Gaiety theater looks great! after recently being revamped they really have brought it back to it's former glory.

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Yeah, No

Why do people say that? I'll ask a simple question in the cab such as "did you have a good night" and I get a reply like "Yeah , no, it was great"...... HUH?
I hear people say it all the time on TV ,on the radio, and I constantly overhear it in conversations in the Taxi.
I even hear myself say it from time to time!
Listen out for it!
What does it mean?
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Tappers

I don't really know why they're called that, maybe it's because they tap you for money, or possibly it's the way they tap the window to get your attention.
Either way the Ranks are now flooded with them. I no longer give them anything, my reasons include the obvious; like seeing the same individual wasted on drugs or alcohol later on, or the less obvious; they often frighten the shit out of me when they tap the window.
They also don't show a lot of appreciation, as they will try tap you again when you return to the rank even if you gave them money last time round, the least you can ask for in return is to be remembered!
Would you or do you give?

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Super Tuesday

Great stuff!... it's on TV overnight, I love elections, being Irish I'm a Democrat, but to be honest I don't really know why, I hear they're the more liberal and that sounds good to me and as Bill Clinton did good things here in Ireland, I s'pose I'll G on his missus?? Not very practical reasons for supporting anyone but hey.... you need to back a horse if you're going to enjoy the race. (errr I don't gamble either, well apart from the oul game of poker on Good Friday)
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Taxi Drivers night Off

Ever wonder what a Taxi driver does on his night off? Well tonight while the rest of my family sleep, I'll be working my way through this lot whilst watching a couple of movies on the DVD player. Glamorous eh?


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Simply Tragic

Yesterday I attended the funeral of my sons 17 year old friend, who died after crashing his car on his way home from work.
He was probably driving too fast, he probably had the car stereo at full blast, he probably took one too many chances, he was just the same as any other 17 year old boy driving his first car. He was unlucky and tragically the safety features built into his car were not sufficient to preserve his young life.
His mother was other worldly, I doubt she had any idea of her situation, his father had a similarly vacant expression, his young sister sobbed uncontrollably, calling out her brothers name from time to time.
It was heartbreaking listening to six of his classmates struggle tearfully through the prayers of the faithful, all around... young girls were breaking down.
The offertory gifts included an X-Box 360 controller and game and the coffin left the church to a song by the rock group "The Killers", all contriving to drive home the nature of the tragedy; The untimely death of a young boy.
I've no suggestions or solutions, I wrote this in an effort to purge my mind of the memory of it all, I may delete it tomorrow, this place is supposed to be light hearted.
Sorry!
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Just a few Pictures

I'm having a lazy night.
Here's a few of my crappy pictures;

First up the Chas Mahal, also known as the office of the Taoiseach (Prime Minister).
It's called the Chas Mahal because Charles Haughey (Chas) was Taoiseach when a vast sum was spent doing it up...money well spent I.M.O.

The Chas Mahal

Next up is the Irish Navy, well half of it, yeah we've only got the two boats! It's in port at the moment.

The Irish Navy

Now for number three, it's Quay 16, Dublin's newest Restaurant and bar, it's floating in the Liffey at the North Wall, sorry but it just doesn't do it for me!

Quay 16

Last and least ME, Would you mess with this bastard?

ME

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Vermillion

I was a punter last night, I went to Vermillion, the Indian Restaurant that got 6th place int the Dubliner's top 100 restaurants so expectations were high;
The dining room is modern with nice leather bound chairs and it doesn't feel as though they've squeezed in as many as possible, so full marks on that front.
We were met by smiles all round, our coats were taken and we were led to our table for four.
I had the chicken Tikka starter which melted in my mouth, the girls had the vegetable selection for two which was devoured and unusually no tastes were offered! my mate had chicken with pineapple and cashew nuts ....... I had a piece and it was lovely.
For mains us lads both had Biryani, the portion was HUGE and we ate it all.... to be honest one would have been enough to share and the scales will need to be put away for a week, My wife had a Prawn dish which got oooohs and aaaaahs and J had number 6 on the menu ????? which again was a winner.
Two chocolate fudge and two creme brulees to finish were standard fare and all of the above was washed down with Cobra beer, so no fancy wine to report on I'm afraid!
Total cost including tips ....€200 reasonable price for this town.
We ended up in the Terenure Inn for a few scoops and all agreed we'd be back for more.
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I'm having a January Sale

In an effort to get with the system I'm going to be a good little capitalist and stick a 50% off all fares sign on my roof!
I'll pull up at the back of the ranks and using a loud hailer advertise my low low prices, taking customers ahead of all the other Taxis queuing for fares.
All perfectly legal I believe?
But then again............... I've kinda gotten used to being alive.
It's a joke lads.................CHILL OUT!
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Coughs and Sneezes spread Diseases

I've got a cold, it's a typical head cold; coughing and sneezing, a bit of a headache and generally lethargic, it's annoying but not bad enough to keep me off work.
However, should I be more considerate and think of my passengers? It's obviously contagious and there's a high probability I'll infect some unsuspecting customers?
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A bit of a Pane

Didn't go to work on new Years Day, I felt a bit delicate after the party, which was a great success.... even if I do say so myself.
I've just been out to give the cab it's once over and clean for tonight and discovered my rear window is smashed! (do you get the pun in the title?) most likely lads playing ball in the field beside us, or possibly a vindictive act, as some neighbors have been calling the guards for a small group of teenagers that have been gathering recently at the entrance to the field, they seem harmless enough but will assume it was me that called as I'm closest to the action.
My insurance was renewed only yesterday (1st January) and I'd only added windscreen cover....how jammy is that???
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Howyas

Just back from a mates gaff, completely locked, I made some racket getting the pressies out of the attic but it's all part of the legend....happy crimbo
BYEEEEEEEEEE
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Gatekeeper turned poacher

For the next few days I'll be the one drunk in the passenger seat, messing with the heating and stereo controls of another's car, possibly even falling asleep!
Thankfully the other person is my ever patient and teetotal wife, who chauffeurs me around at times like these, she keeps threatening to take up the drink but so far so good.
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The longest night

Well fellow children of the night..... wasn't it great? there was only a few hours of the dreaded sunshine yesterday.
It was tinged with a little sadness though, as from today we'll lose 2 minutes of darkness every night until that dreaded day in June, when I'll remain in my casket under the stairs undisturbed for the entire day.
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