Homemade Dublin Taxi

Mums beat up Fiat Punto complete with L plates, Cardboard sign.....actually picked up customers!


A month or so ago, as a dare.... this guy took his mothers car, added a home made roof sign and worked for 2 days as a Taxi in Dublin, Queuing on the ranks and taking jobs, much to the amusement of other "Taxi" drivers and the public, he was stopped on 3 occasions by the police who appologised to his "customers", telling them they wouldn't be delayed for long, they let him go ahead when he explained it was a Dare stunt being filmed for TV.
The show will go out on November the 12th, I'll try to get hold of a you tube clip if I can.



View Irish Taxi HOMEPAGE

I'm missing out on a busy fun filled night

I'm off work this week, well... I'm minding my son and doing some painting and decorating, whilst my wife and daughter shop 'til they drop in Chicago, Illinois, (A yearly excursion to the States for pre-xmas shopping).
Meanwhile, I'm missing one of the busiest nights of the year.. Halloween! We take Halloween very seriously over here, after all...... WE INVENTED IT! It's the "Eve of all hallows" a pagan festival when the dead roam the earth and are welcomed back into the bosom of their families, fed and entertained before "going on". Children dress up as the dead and "trick" their neighbors into giving them "treats".
I'd normally stay home and answer the door to "trick or treaters" then watch the bonfire and fireworks with the kids, afterwards head off to work one of the most eventful and fun nights of the year, Lads in dresses, French maids, sexy nurses, etc. etc. All doing their best to stay "in character", Alas this year I'll return to the decorating after the bonfire....Woe is me........HA HA

A halloween treat.....A scare at bedtime

The tale of the Banshee as told by Podge and Rodge.
It's worth the 6 minutes if you can spare them

I've sold out to the man

OK I'll admit it, I'm a dirty rotten capitalist. I've added a shop to the blog.
"Irish Taxi recommends" (in the column on the left)is a store linking to items stocked by amazon.
To be honest I don't expect to make anything from it, I just like to try things out, see how they work and what reaction they get.
So then, what's your take on that type of thing? does it go against the spirit of blogging?
Any suggestions as to what I should add to the selection? pretty much everything is available!

a link to the store

Christmas Carnival scaled back considerably.

The carnival in bonn;



I knew as soon as it was announced, that a Christmas carnival to be organised in Blackrock park, which was to include Fairground attractions, an Ice rink and a market, wouldn't see the light of day as proposed.
The snooty upper class residents of this area were up in arms, thinking a bunch of riff raff would descend on their leafy suburb and they immediately set about letter writing complaints to the local council.
So far, the fairground attractions are gone, sure, that would cause untold damage to the grass, don't you know!
Watch this space and see the ice rinks disappearance!
A nice Christmas market for the locals will just about survive I guess.
Shame, it would have produced good business for us Taxi drivers, as would the proposed development in the following story;
Reminds me of the uproar when a Casino, along with a hotel, gym and ancillary projects, was to be built on the site of the old Phoenix Park Race course, (one gambling den for another) but the high ho residents kicked up a fuss and now they've got a horrendous high rise apartment complex instead .........muppets!

Coming to town? this is the place to stay!

The Ritz Carlton Enniskerry, Only us Taxi drivers can afford it!



Your room...... Madam/sir



The bill, (and don't expect any breakfast!)



need glasses?...Click image to enlarge

Government chicken out

The government has postponed it's decision to disallow provisional license holders drive unaccompanied until June 30th, after a public outcry against the decision.
CHICKENS! they said it would save over 400 lives a year, does this mean 200 odd lives will be lost to garner a few extra votes?

Taxi driver "fears for his own life and will never drive Taxi again"

The Taxi driver in who's car John Daly was assassinated (see earlier post) has spoken to the papers;
Mike, aged 40, a father of 4, including a 3 year old baby, has been a taxi driver in Dublin for 16 years, says he now fears for his own life after witnessing the murder and will never again drive a Taxi.
Recalling the horrific incident, he remembers catching a glimpse of a figure to the left of the car when suddenly the passenger window exploded, he instinctively turned to his right to avoid the glass as 5 more shots where fired into his cab,the police say this is what saved him being shot. He tried to get out of the cab but John Daly's body had slumped over him, stopping him doing so.
Since the event he finds himself repeatedly saying in his mind "please, please, please, please don't shoot me. He says he checks himself constantly, feeling the sensation that he is bleeding along his left side where John Daly fell against him, and is certain that the killers will come and target both him and his family.

Tuk-Tuks, do you think there's a market?

This baby could be imported and sold, new and road legal, for about €10,000, they're economical, eco friendly, and easy to service....... I wonder would it sell?

Prostitute has some good advice for Pharmacists

A girl flagged me down on Baggot Street bridge, from a distance she looked a pretty young thing, quite leggy, blonde...... a head turner. I stopped to let her in and instantly recognised her as being a prostitute, the slow Dublin droll, the gaunt pasty look, and the overwhelming smell of talc.
The speech, slow and dreamy, to me is associated with drug abuse, everything seems to slow down somehow.
Rialto love, she said, then on to Drimnagh, I have to pick up a message.
This is typical, she was picking up her drugs, a catch 22 if ever there was one, she works to feed her drug habit, she does drugs in order to be able to work.
By right I shouldn't allow drugs in my cab, I could end up losing my license, but every passenger, regardless of "class" might have some, and who am I to make assumptions.
A message, I said, Heroin or cocaine?
Both, she said, I need the smack to come down off the coke.
Snorting or shooting the coke? I asked.
I inject it into my groin, she said, I'm very lucky, I inject it into the same spot every time, I just pick off the scab. Some of my mates have no veins left.
I nearly puked!
The pick up was swift enough, in a garage in Rialto, she got out, a car pulled in and the deal was done, as far as I was concerned, she was getting sweets!
When she got back into the car there was a noticeable difference, her speech sped up, she was sweating, anxious to get her "hit" I reckoned.
Will you stop off at the garage in Crumlin? she asked, appologising for being a pain.
No worries, I said, you need some smokes?
Nah, just getting sweets, bang went my excuse to the guards then!
She came back to the car at the garage with a plastic bag, crammed full of Kinder chocolate bars, what the F**k? I said.
AWW jaysus! she said, you get ravenous for choccy after the buzz, you know how the Chemists are moaning about not making money from the methadone dealing? Well they should stock up on the "kinders" and they'd be raking it in!
I wonder how long she has left on the planet?...poor girl.

Stock up on Kinder!
Nido Kinder Instant Milk Mix, 3.96-Pound Container

Free Taxis ! Alternative transport 3

The ECO-cab;


These have been operating in Dublin since April and will take you anywhere within a 2km radius of the city centre (officially the GPO or General post Office in O Connell St)
They pay for themselves through advertising revenue.
this is their web-page

It seems I could have been done for drink driving!

Beware! This could be you, if you're conscientious about dental health.
As mentioned in a previous post I've been dieting, the method I chose, "Lipotrim" causes the body to go into "ketosis" which means fat is burned at a fast rate, the downside of this is very bad breath, not an admirable quality in a Taxi driver!
To offset this I've been gargling "Listerine" mouthwash a few times each evening, (I'm sure fellow drivers thought I was puking out of the door of my cab on the rank!).
It seems Listerine, along with all the other proprietary mouthwashes are 20% proof and simply by following the instructions and gargling for 30 seconds will fool the breathalyser into believing you are up to 4 times the legal limit!
Thankfully I'm finished the diet and can revert to sugar free gums (they were banned on the diet)

Out of interest an average of 400 people per week are arrested for drink driving in Ireland.

Why not get your own breathalyser......... to be sure! only $59.95

Alcohawk Slim Digital Alcohol Breath Tester

Poll, should Taxis be a uniform colour

PLEASE TAKE PART!

The regulator here is considering having all Taxis be a uniform colour depending on County. For Dublin it would be Sky blue.

Do you agree or disagree?

The Poll can be found in the column on the left

2006 statistics for Ireland that may surprise you

• 14.6% of households in urban areas were victims of a crime
• 88.7% recycled some element of their household waste
• The average price of a new home was €305,637 for the state (€405,957 for Dublin)
• There were 103 mobile phones for every 100 people
• 19% of the population were at risk of poverty
  

Some thought provoking facts in amongst that lot!

Irish Government set to solve traffic Chaos overnight!

The Irish government has passed legislation banning 430,000 drivers from November 1.
Up to now holders of a provisional licence were permitted to use their cars whilst awaiting their test, resulting in some people driving on a provisional licence for years....... either by repeatedly failing the test or by simply never doing one!

430,00 new customers for us Taxi drivers????????

The new laws are as follows;

• The provisional licence is being replaced by a learner permit, to emphasise the holder is learning to drive
• The holder of a provisional license/learner permit must be accompanied by the holder of a full license (valid a minimum of two years) at all times
• A provisional licence/ learner permit must be held for a minimum of six months before applying for a test.
• The person who accompanies the learner is liable to random alcohol testing and ban/penalty points will ensue if found to be over the limit
• A €1000 fine will be levied for not displaying an L plate
• Lower speed limits for learner drivers
• Higher penalty points for learner drivers
• reduced speed limits for learner drivers
  

Arcade fire in the big top

With the closure of the point depot for renovation and due to building work around it, Dublin is without a large major indoor arena for gigs! This has been overcome with the construction of a "big Top" in the Phoenix Park. The first event was "Arcade Fire" who played to 10,000 people in the over-sized tent and by all accounts it was a great success.
It was fairly lucrative for me anyway!

If you want to Listen to/download some Arcade Fire tracks....... just click the link below
Arcade Fire

It won't appear if you have adblock!

Open letter to the Taxi Regulator

I am a legal Taxi operator working nights in Dublin City and surrounds, never once have I had my cab checked by one of your investigators, something we were promised in your manifesto.
As a result I feel it would be easy to operate a Taxi illegally in this city, simply by purchasing a roof sign and a meter (god knows what rates would apply)
Illegal ranks abound, outside public houses and night clubs, or at the end of busy streets (Grafton Street is a prime example) close to where legitimate Ranks have taxis queuing for fares that never arrive.
There are not enough Ranks to service the ever growing numbers of Taxis on our streets, and those few new ranks that are in places are devoid of any likely passengers! Something needs to be done about this as ranks provide a necessary break from driving constantly around this clogged up city, along with the chance of a fare.
The sheer number of Taxis is getting beyond a joke, do you seriously believe there is no limit to the number of Taxis the city can absorb? With the economy in decline the use of Taxis will decline also and what's worse, a number of those made redundant in the cutback in construction will try their hand at Taxi driving, thereby increasing the number of Taxis in a declining market.

Urban wildlife

Foxes badgers and deer seem to be thriving in suburbia.
I come across an average of twenty foxes each evening, they tend to scavenge amongst the rubbish and are particularly visible the night before bin collection in an area. Foxes are despised in rural ares as the kill chickens lambs and other small farm animals but city dwellers love them.

Badgers are less obvious but I'd see one or two a week, always surprised at how large they are and at their speed , another creature despised in the rural areas due to their association with TB in cattle, so much so that if discovered they are followed and the set is then baited with all occupants destroyed , totally illegal but it goes on.

Deer, I see less often in suburbia but hundreds reside in the Phoenix Park and are plain to see as I drive through in the early hours, I come across the odd one in the new housing estates built on the foothills of the mountains around Stepaside and Ticknock.

New safety measures being introduced

The government here are proposing to;

• Reduce the allowable Alcohol level to 50mg from 80mg per ml of blood.

I like this proposal it will cut out the "how many can I have and stay legal" brigade, this is less than one unit and just allows for the morning after, provided there is an adequate rest period.

• Increase the number of speed cameras by 600 units

Not so sure about this, regular users of a road discover quickly where the cameras are and most good Navigators know the whereabouts as well, having these cuts down the number of physical checks by actual police, the only true deterrent.

• A complete overhaul of the national speed limits

Well overdue, hopefully some will increase as well as those that decrease.

The worst piece of public art, and some of the best

I have decided this is the worst "The Gateway"
What the sculpture said;
"IT GIVES NUCLEUS AND PUNCTUATION TO DUN LAOGHAIRE PAVILION"
Yeah sure!





This one is old, but I think it's the best "Daniel O Connell (the Liberator)";



The Spire;
many despise it but I think it's cool!

3 out of 4 Irish Taxi drivers have Hypertension

I read this in Irishhealth.com;

Over 100 taxi drivers were randomly selected and tested for high blood pressure at Dublin Airport in May of this year. Results showed 74% were affected. A blood pressure measurement in excess of the internationally recognised goal of 140/90mmHg was considered hypertensive. GP referrals were made where necessary.

This makes me even more determined to keep the weight off and live a healthier lifestyle.

Thank god it wasn't me driving............

A Dublin criminal was assassinated last night whilst sitting in the front passenger seat of a Taxi in Dublin, the driver picked him and his friends up from outside a nightclub in the city.
I really hope the driver gets some counseling and is able to continue in his chosen job.

The story;

A notorious armed robber who sparked a prison security scare after calling a radio show from his cell has been shot dead.

Dublin criminal John Daly, 27, who sparked a major clampdown on the use of mobile phones in Irish jails after calling RTE's Liveline programme, was shot as he sat in a taxi with three other men in the north of the city. He was hit several times from point blank range.

Opposition politicians warned the murder may lead to an escalation in gangland crime. Gardai said a lone gunman carried out the killing at Cloonlara Drive, Finglas South. It is understood Daly, from the Cloonlara area, was singled out by the killer and hit up to five times. He was rushed to the Mater Hospital where he was pronounced dead.

i-walks.............. an innovative way to see Dublin

I had a couple in the car last night that told me about these, they downloaded them at home in France (in French, they are also available in many other languages)
They then put them on their MP3 player and where guided around Dublin for the few days of their visit. They said they were fantastic............ and even better, they're FREE!
If any of you know of other cities that offer this service I'd love to here about them, they sound like a great way to learn more about the cities you visit.

• Dublin i-walks

And now the site to clear your brain of my crap..........

• So you want to make your own nuclear bomb? here's your ingredient supplier!!!
  

We! Are the champions of the Wuurld!

There was a tremendous amount of South Africans in town last night, celebrating their win over England in the Rugby world cup. I never realised there was so many of them in the city!
They were great winners! very humble, just happy that they'd won it, none of the "We are the best, now bow at our feet" sort of attitude you get from other nations.
I played, Queens "We are the champions" for each South African I had in the car and they seemed to appreciate it.
They are definitely not a singing nation, not by any stretch of the imagination, VERY GENEROUS THOUGH! at least when their in good form.

• New Feature,

I thought I might add some links to some of the wackier sites I've come across on the net....... as an antidote to my moronic ramblings, some may be of an adult nature, this will not be the reason for their inclusion, it'll have more to do with their strangeness, I'll add warnings in advance.

First up; (Adult content) Slavercise Fancy getting toned up? why not get your very own Mistress to knock you into shape !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Adult content)

Obesity and the Taxi driver

Like many Taxi drivers,I have struggled with being overweight, it's a stagnant sort of job aligned with a degree of stress, (driving and awkward customers).
I turned 45 recently and decided it was time to do something about it once and for all...... if I intended lasting a few more years.
I've tried many "diets" in the past and always failed miserably so I decided to use the same method I used to give up the cigarettes all those years ago......cold turkey!
I chose Lipotrim; a total food replacement diet and since July 17th I've lost 5 stone!
I'm not advocating the same for anyone else, it was quite difficult and if it wasn't delivered by Pharmacies I would have grave concerns about it...only thing is it works and it's FAST!
Here are the obligatory before and after pictures
Before;

...........................................................................After;





View Irish Taxi HOMEPAGE

Is it worth it?

Saw a similar post in my mate "Paradise Driver" blog, He's one of the inspirations for this place. If he's getting dis-heartened you can guess how I feel. Very few hits and hardly any comments. I think I'll trundle on though it's good therapy.
Visitors over the last 30 days;


Location of Visitors;



click photos to enlarge

Name Dropping

I recently had David Kelly in the cab (He was the Grandfather in Charlie and the Chocolate factory, the one with Johnny Depp) So I thought I'd do a name dropping post of famous? folk I've had in the cab, All are Irish and most are famous only in Ireland/UK but hey you can't have everything!

David Kelly;

I brought David home from the theater, he waxed lyrically about old Dublin, surprised me by saying he's never driven a car!

James Nesbit; Very popular TV Actor in the UK


Collected him from a wrap party in the Portobello pub going to the Morrison hotel, two girls that were getting into the car as I dropped him decided not to bother and followed him, so he owes me!

Paul Mc Grath, Ireland Manchester United and Aston Villa defender, picked him up in Ranelagh and brought him to Lillies Night club, he was a perfect gentleman;


Stephen Gately; Singer with now disbanded Boyband, Boyzone.Brought him to the Cedar tree for a Boyzone book launch. Now strutting his stuff on the stage in Londons West End. Only Celebrity I've ever asked for an autograph......my daughter was a huge fan at the time.


Paul Brady; Famous Irish singer songwriter, has had his songs performed by Tina Turner, My favorite song of his is "the Island" brought him to the Airport,I was surprised he had an interest in the Irish entrant to the Eurovision Song contest and asked me to higher the radio volume when it came on.



Kian from Westlife, another Boyband! I brought him and his girlfriend to a bungalow in Stilorgan after a gig


Pauline Mc Glynn, Mrs Doyle from "Father Ted" a complete nutcase had me laughing the entire trip, brought her home from as charity event in Royal Hospital in Donnybrook.



Samantha Mumba, Singer/ Model and Actress one word.......beautiful



Pete Postlewaite, Brought him from South William Street to rathgar , very quiet journey


Other celebs have been Irish soap stars, DJs and politicians, so I won't bother!

Naked Camera Taxi Skits

Irish Rugby

Lots of dissapointed Rugby Fans about last night after Ireland's inability to make it out of the group stages;

The Irish Rugby team were the only one to walk out on to the pitch without their flag and also the only one not to play their National Anthem before each game, instead, in order to appease the Northerners we had a concocted flag supposed to represent the four provinces and a pop song called "Ireland's Call"

No Flag
No Anthem
No Pride
No Passion

They deserve to be coming home!